Author Archives: Sterling Eisiminger

Dr. Sterling (“Skip”) Eisiminger was born in Washington DC in 1941. The son of an Army officer, he traveled widely but often reluctantly with his family in the United States and Europe. After finishing a master’s degree at Auburn and taking a job at Clemson University in 1968, he promised himself that he would put down some deep roots. These roots now reach back through fifty years of Carolina clay. In 1974, Eisiminger received a Ph.D. from the University of South Carolina, where poet James Dickey “guided” his creative dissertation. His publications include Non-Prescription Medicine (poems), The Pleasures of Language: From Acropox to Word Clay (essays), Omi and the Christmas Candles (a children’s book), and Wordspinner (word games). He is married to the former Ingrid (“Omi”) Barmwater, a native of Germany, and is the proud father of a son, Shane, a daughter, Anja, and grandfather to four grandchildren, Edgar, Sterling, Spencer, and Lena.

Gun Battles: 2018

“‘In the name of freedom, Christmas, and mom,/give every man a nuclear bomb,’/said Kip from a stump—’One man, one nuke!’/Kip still regrets not killing more gooks,/and he’s still ‘gun-ho’ as his friends used to say/behind the bulwarks of Cam Ranh Bay.”—Skip Eisiminger Skip the B.S. By Skip Eisiminger CLEMSON South Carolina—(Weekly Hubris)—May 2018— Gun Battles: […]

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Light: An Appreciation

“[Light] enables all vision/as it sears the eye,/it’s the scalpel/for the callus it creates. . . .” —Skip Eisiminger Skip the B.S. By Skip Eisiminger CLEMSON South Carolina—(Weekly Hubris)—March 2018 Light By Skip Eisiminger “I will love the light for it shows me the way, yet I will endure the darkness for it shows me […]

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From Strangler Figs to Flyovers: Bridges

“My father learned the art of bridge building at the University of Illinois and then taught the art in the Army Corps of Engineers. But before assisting in building three floating bridges to carry allied forces across the Rhine in WWII, he ordered six weeks of reading, writing, and arithmetic for some six hundred of […]

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Montaigne’s Goat: Certainty & Uncertainty

“If I had been a Jew living under Hitler, I hope I would have mustered the courage to enter a plot to kill the blighter. Holed up in an attic overlooking a street leading to the Reichstag, I would have pawned a kidney if necessary to buy a rifle from a deserter on the black […]

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Darkness at 14:37 EDT: Eclipse

“As the temperatures climbed back into the 90s following the recent eclipse, I was struck by the fact that the entire enterprise is riding on loose rock. I walked off testing the ground like a novice hiker probing a marsh, a blind man tapping out an unfamiliar route.” —Skip Eisiminger Skip the B.S. By Skip […]

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The Farther You Go, the Better It Looks: Home (Best of WH)

“Clark Gable is remembered as a thrice-divorced and five-time married screen actor, but he understood what ‘home’ meant: a place you approach knowing someone inside is listening for your footsteps. Whether it’s an over-priced Silicon Valley mansion or a canvas tent pitched on a raft, home is a place where your heart has been marinated […]

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Deaf to Their Warnings, Immune to Their Poisons: Snakes

“The blithe independence of snakes did not sit well with Ralph Waldo Emerson. In 1834, he criticized four snakes he’d seen ‘gliding’ up and down a Massachusetts valley, ‘not to eat, not for love, but only gliding.’ I can only guess that Emerson was ophidiophobic because otherwise he was a great advocate of self-reliant ‘gliding.’”—Skip […]

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Holy Half-Wits: Celibacy

“The pretense of chastity is available with a $30 purchase of a silicon hymen, which releases a red dye when subjected to pressure. What’s interesting is that some females are born without hymens, and others who have them don’t always bleed from them when they are ruptured. Thus, the possibilities for abuse are abundant in […]

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Deaf Grasshoppers & Hobbled Ants: Malpractice

“Though only about 15 pecent of American doctors are sued for malpractice, more than 250,000 patients die annually from their doctors’ errors, a statistic that ranks as the country’s third leading cause of death. My own definition of malpractice embraces all of the following: In 1985, my wife was charged $12 for two Tylenols and […]

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Pieing It Forward: Clowning

“In March of 2017 as I write, many Americans like myself are bewildered by a ‘jester’ who has seized the ‘throne,’ and it remains to be seen how the leveling will fare under his good-cop-bad-cop rule. Seeking some comic relief after Donald Trump’s election, I suggested to my wife that we ‘send in the clowns,’ […]

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